Philip, Herodias, and Antipas

Antipas, one of the sons of Herod the Great, fell in love with his half-brother Philip’s wife, Herodias. Although Moses’s law mandated a brother marry his dead brother’s widow, provided she had no child (known as the Levirate marriage), Herodias didn’t qualify for such a marriage because her husband, Philip, was still alive, and they had a daughter, Salome. Yet, Herodias procured Philip’s divorce and married Antipas. Because of this, John the baptizer opposed Antipas marrying Herodias, and Herodias held a grudge that cost John his head (Mark 6:17–19). John’s words were:

“It is not permissible (exestin) for you to have the wife of your brother.” (6:18)

While Jesus and the disciples entered Judea, the Pharisees approached Jesus with a sequential question to John’s condemnation. Whereas John objected to stealing and marrying one’s brother’s wife, they wanted to know if what Philip, the husband, did – let go (apoluo) of his wife – was correct. (Apoluo can mean “separation” or “divorce” based on one’s situation.) The Pharisees asked,

“Is it permissible (exestin) for a man [Philip] to let go (apoluo) a wife/woman [Herodias].” (10:2)

Would Jesus agree with John and say, “Yes, Philip’s action was wrong,” or would he disagree with John and say, “No, Philip didn’t do anything wrong”? Perhaps Jesus’s extended stay in Galilee, Antipas’s territory, softened him compared to John. This was a test (10:2b).

Jesus had threefold answers. First, the Law allowed “letting go” (apoluo) because of people’s hardened hearts (10:3–5; Deut 24:1, 3; Isa 50:1; Jer 3:8). Deuteronomy speaks of such a hardening of one’s heart: a newlywed husband doesn’t find the proof of his bride’s virginity and wants to divorce her (22:13–19). A similar hardening of one’s heart leads to letting go. A softened heart would forgive a spouse’s [apparent] sins and not seek apoluo (e.g., Joseph, Jesus’s father).

Second, creation speaks of a male and a female leaving their parents and clinking to each other until they become one person/flesh (Mark 10:6–8). The intention of marriage was for two people to merge into one, not separate, after a certain time. God yoked them together (syn “together” zugos “yoked”) as would two beasts of burden working the field together under one yoke, and no one should separate them (10:9).

Third, letting go of one’s spouse with the intention of marrying another was adultery – covenantal unfaithfulness (10:10–12). In business, it may be prudent – to transfer debt from a credit card that charges 22% interest to another that charges 18%. But in relationships, especially in marriage, it was adultery. Herodias was guilty of that – she let go of Philip for Antipas. He, too, like John, blamed Herodias for the divorce and Antipas, not Philip, for letting Herodias go.

The Old Testament (Deut 24:1–4) and the New Testament (1 Cor 7:15–16) allow separation and divorce. After separation or divorce, if reconciliation is possible, one should seek it (1 Cor 7:10). In any abuses with an unrepentant spouse, letting go – separation or divorce – may be the best option.

But before we let go, i.e., enter separation or divorce, we should ask ourselves three questions: Am I being hardhearted that I can’t stay in this marriage? Am I separating a relationship that God established since I don’t want to leave and cleave, be yoked together with someone God thought was an excellent fellow yoke-bearer? Am I doing this for or because of adultery? Only the person thinking of “letting go” can answer these questions.